Men’s Issues

Mens IssuesMen and women are different. However, we are more alike than different.

But, we tend to focus on the differences. By doing so we accentuate and exaggerate how different we are. In most respects, we are quite the same yet we allow the differences to drive a wedge between us, to separate and alienate us. If we acknowledge both the similarities and the differences between men and women, then we’d be more attracted to one another.

In order for women and men to respect and understand one another better, they need to appreciate and honor the other for their qualities and strengths. They need to accept and be grateful for their complementarities. We fall into a trap of wanting our cross-gender mate to be more liked us. And that’s impossible. We will always be different and unable to fulfill one another in all areas.

Men have many important roles to play in life – as fathers, husbands, problem-solvers, house-holders, listeners, friends, caretakers, leaders, lovers, protectors, warriors, creators, etc. Historically, men have had power over women. But over the past 50 to 100 years, women have been owning and asserting their rights and equality.

For a time, from the 1960’s through the 1990’s, we had a growing men’s movement in America. But, unfortunately, it has faltered. However, research in the development and treatment of men has been revived in the fields of psychology and counseling. New perspectives and approaches to men are growing. And, Dr. Miller has been studying it.

Many men don’t understand how to identify their emotions, communicate effectively, express their feelings adequately, harness their anger and aggression, and allow themselves to become vulnerable or courageous. Most men are confused about why they frustrate women. Many men feel criticized by women for not being good enough.

Most men believe in the deeply ingrained cultural dictates about how they should behave, think and feel. They are imprisoned by cultural expectations, myths and stigma. Meanwhile, many men never get to discover who they really are, recognizing all sides of themselves and being proud of who they are as an individual and a group.

You don’t have to put down women to feel strong and proud to be a man. Like women, men are magnificent and honorable creatures. But many men have been wounded since childhood and find it impossible to free themselves of limited roles and self-expectations.

Through focused psychotherapy, men can learn to become more alive, communicative and expressive. They can learn to let down their defenses, expand their capabilities, identify and express their emotions, give and receive love, develop gratifying relationships, shrug off false and confining beliefs, stop destructive habits, and discover their hidden strengths. At the same time, they can continue to solve problems and protect and provide for their families.

Few men seek individual or couples therapy unless they are under duress or crisis. But Dr. Miller understands and respects men for how they are. He is male-friendly and provides a more balanced approach to heterosexual couples. He welcomes men into his practice and he respects the male and the female perspectives.

Dr. Miller is not biased or lopsided toward a feminine perspective with couples. He speaks the language of men and of women. He makes therapy easier and more palatable to men by helping them navigate through the process.

Revel Miller puts no pressure on men to become more like a woman in order to please their woman.

He helps men to gradually expand and reveal themselves to become more, even more masculine. This is a breath of fresh air to many men who enter individual and couples therapy because they often fear that they will be blamed for the problems in their relationships and manipulated into becoming more feminine in order to get more love and to save their relationship or marriage. With this approach, men become more active and voluntarily participate in therapy.

This is a great advantage for women who engage in couples or marital therapy with Dr. Miller. If you are a frustrated woman, couples therapy with Dr. Miller may help you get what you are craving from your man.

Dr. Miller helps men to identify and share their feelings and thoughts so that they can feel and demonstrate more love, respect and compassion for their woman. So that a woman can understand her man better, get closer and fulfill more of her man’s needs.  A woman can awaken and feel more gratitude for who their man is, what his strengths are, and how he thinks and behaves. In return, that woman can get her needs met better.

This type of approach is a valuable advantage to female partners and spouses because communication with and sensitivity to one another improves. And ultimately, isn’t that what all men and women want?

So, if you feel locked-up and limited as a guy, participating in specialized therapy for men may be the key to feeling stronger, more alive and proud of your masculinity.

You’re not alone. Make yourself free.

If you feel too restricted and yearn for more freedom as a man,

Call Dr. Miller TODAY at 805-448-5053

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